Let’s play with our wives

Charles Ighele

“Let’s play with our wives” was the title I gave to an outing with some couples sometime ago. It was a one-day recreational affair for the couples almost all of whom are professionals, businessmen and women. We left Lagos early that Saturday morning to a resort by the great expanse of water in one of the numerous lagoons in Lagos. There, we danced with our wives. We ate and we drank coconut water. We went on boat rides on the great waters. Some went on other rides. At about four o’clock, we started the journey back to Lagos after hours of fun. We had a session of discussion on how to make our marriages better.

About two weeks ago, I was out again, this time at a private resort on a beach by the Atlantic Ocean. I was there with my wife, my daughter and her husband with their four little children, my children (minus one) and in fact the entire household with five visitors. Very soon, I will leave my home in the morning with only my wife to a resort, where we will spend the whole day and return home in the evening. We shall hold hands, while strolling. We shall hold each other waist-to-waist, while strolling. We will chat. We will laugh. We will kiss. We will fall on the sand like a newly-wed. We thoroughly enjoy ourselves during these periodic outings as a family or as a couple. This is aside the weekly dates with my wife, when we like taking a meal once a week outside our home. I create time for this despite my busy schedule. I am a very busy man, but I have always been determined to ensure that I create time to play with these two categories of people: First, my wife and second, other members of my household. All work, no play makes Efezino a dull boy.

Someone may argue, how can one take his wife out, when he can barely take two meals a day? I have been married to my wife for over 30 years and there was a time early in our marriage that I did not have the means to take her out. But I never allowed lack of money to stop me from providing fun for my wife. In those years, both of us would take motorcycles used for transport (Okada) to a hotel with a swimming pool and other facilities. We would buy the cheapest bottle of soft drinks and ask for two tumblers to share the content. We drank, chatted, took a walk and then took another ride back home, because we had no car. I strongly believe it is the duty of the man, the husband, the head, and leader of the home to deliberately create fun for his wife and household. It is one of the basic duties of a man. So, I believe. Thank God for the food we provide for the family as husbands and other great things we do. But there is an area where the average African man has not done so well, as far as civilised behaviour is concerned. It is in the area of providing fun for our wives and children.

John chapter18:1-2 mentions a resort by the name “Brook Cedron, where was a garden” where “Jesus often RESORTED with his disciples.” I am of the view that Jesus did not only go to that resort to pray. He also went there to relax with His disciples. Let us learn to take our wives out. If you do not learn to play with your wife now, you will be like strangers to each other at old age.

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In this article:
Charles Ighele
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