Warning Signs Of An Abusive Relationship (2)
OKAY; I promised to do the concluding part today. Here it is Extreme Anger And Jealousy
There are justifiable reasons to be jealous and angry with your partner but when you discover that an individual is possessed with anger; nothing ever makes him or her happy; nothing really excites him or her; he or she doesn’t want you around the opposite sex; you constantly get questioned over irrelevant things like your calls, time out with friends, activities in the office; he or she monitors your phone and without your permission, goes through your messages; he or she forces you to release your passwords… you obviously need some time for a talk with yourself regarding the future.
Abusive partners see your parents, siblings, and friends as serious threats to your relationship. In fact, some of them will go the extent of using your email and social media accounts to destroy your relationship with friends and relatives.
They neither believe in your commitment nor do they trust your personality. To an abusive partner, every noise brings suspicion and every whisper is love making. If he or she calls and you fail to pick up, there is no reason good enough to clear his or her doubt.
An abusive partner ensures you get stripped of every healthy relationship you have; they make you lose job and business opportunities; your friends must be his friends; you have no right to hang out with anyone unless he or she is there. All an abusive partner wants is to get you to begin to see yourself as nothing without him or her.
There is no love if there’s no forgiveness and the forgiveness is never complete if your partner always sing a song with your errors of the past.
Marriage was never made for the perfect and the self-righteous who have no flaws. Perfect people are saints in heaven. Marriage is a union of two imperfect and vulnerable individuals who understand their weaknesses and are willing to depend on the grace of God to work on their weakness while using their strength to make each other better.
They understand that as humans, they will make mistakes and so they need the assurance, support, understanding, and patience of their partner to become better. They trust their partner to protect them from the world.
When your partner finds it very difficult to forgive you and finds every reasonable avenue to remind you of your mistakes, there’s no way you will be smiling with your partner and you will lose the freedom to open up to your partner.
Lack of forgiveness breeds bitterness and hatred in a relationship. If that person uses your past against you, it’s obvious he or she is not the right person for you.
When you find yourself in a relationship where you can’t be yourself and you can’t freely express yourself with your partner; when your fear for your partner is more than your freedom with him or her; when you feel more comfortable withdrawing yourself from your partner than you wish to get close to your partner; when he’s too busy to call you and she’s too busy to pick up your calls and possibly acknowledge your message or gifts; when you are with your partner and yet it feels as though you don’t know anything about him or her; when you want to hide your life from that person; when you cannot discuss anything without one partner accusing the other or insulting the other or making reference to your personality or family; when you cannot disagree with your partner and still celebrate your uniqueness…, you are in the wrong relationship.
While there may be other signs that you are dating an abusive partner, these are the ones that stand out and if ignored, may put your life and marriage in great danger and in most cases, leaves you with many regrets and scars.
Don’t make yourself a case study; learn and take that step today to avoid being used as point of reference when abuse is discussed.