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Why Your Partner Acts Hot-And-Cold

By Njideka Agbo
02 April 2018   |   1:00 pm
We love it when we know our partner loves us. Apart from the sense of security, it gives us, it is a great feeling to love and be loved. While some enjoy the relationship, they get trapped in the fear that their partner's love will soon grow cold. While the breakup may confirm their fears,…

We love it when we know our partner loves us. Apart from the sense of security, it gives us, it is a great feeling to love and be loved. While some enjoy the relationship, they get trapped in the fear that their partner’s love will soon grow cold. While the breakup may confirm their fears, they do not understand it had a lot to do with their thought pattern.

This is particularly bad if the relationship was all you wanted and it can damage your view of love. Before you blame yourself, there are other reasons why he might have started growing cold / developed cold feet in the relationship:

Differences: It might simply be that you both have no shared beliefs and the only bond existing is sex. While sex is healthy, once the fire burns out, the relationship will die a gradual death. This is why it is often recommended to know your partner’s values. At some point, when events that involve rational thinking comes in, the inevitability of values acceptance will come up. This, in turn, might lead to series of misunderstanding.

Love Language: Understanding your partners love language is very crucial. It could be that you express your love within your love language and your partner might think you do not care and have no understanding or respect for his needs. Knowing what tickles your partner’s fancy (an example is affirmative words) will prevent a lot of heartaches.

Exploitation: These days, a lot of people exalt themselves as people who exploit their partner’s vulnerability to satisfy their selfish interest. This exploitation includes not reciprocating the love and attention of your partner and yet, demanding that their partner perform their roles effectively. Once they find out, the relationship will not remain the same.

Uncertainty: Some people are confused as to what they want. One minute, they are happy, the next minute, they are throwing tantrums. Nobody likes to be stressed especially when it involves a partner. A person goes into a relationship with the hopes of living a happy life. If it doesn’t work, there will be no need to stay.
Loving yourself will go a long way and will help you see and work on any flaws you have.

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