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Coming out straight

By Kemi Amushan
30 June 2018   |   3:06 am
I just want to ask one question from our men. Aren’t you guys tired of lying to us women? I’m not just talking about the outright lies like I am into oil and gas and also investment banking/sales and marketing or saying “I used to date a model” and all those kind of crap. I’m…

PHOTO: clutchmagonline.com

I just want to ask one question from our men. Aren’t you guys tired of lying to us women?

I’m not just talking about the outright lies like I am into oil and gas and also investment banking/sales and marketing or saying “I used to date a model” and all those kind of crap.

I’m talking about the one big lie most men are committing everyday: Approaching women you’re attracted to as if sex is the last thing on your mind. You all know what I’m talking about I’m sure.

You’re standing behind some girl at dominos pizza and you have this conversation: “Hey, so which of them do you like”?

You don’t actually care about the flavour!  What you’re really thinking is “God damn, you’re hot! I’d like to fling that menu off your hands and make sweet love to you, right here on this counter!” right? Lol.

The vast majority of men are so worried about letting their true desires be known that they get stuck talking about absolute rubbish that goes nowhere.

Men are afraid to be honest with women about feeling attraction and they believe that if they can just befriend the woman, maybe at some point down the line they’ll have a shot at sleeping with her.

Unfortunately, this strategy usually ends up with the guys being frustrated and alone.

The reason why that happens is because when you approach a woman in this manner, we know it’s inauthentic.

Women are a lot more intuitive than men and will know straight away that the guy is not being genuine.

Men feel kind of awkward for trying to make small talks.

There’s always a little voice in their head saying “You’re full of it.” 

Guys are also worried about the lady finding out why he’s really talking to her.

And that’s assuming that the guy has even taken the step of starting a conversation.

Most men will just sit around and stare at the women. In either case, it’s a pretty far cry from telling the lady the truth.

Now most guys go out of their way to avoid telling women what they really want. It’s been taught that sex is this dirty thing men trick women into doing.

Men think that they’ve got to go out and buy women lots of drinks, hoping to get lucky. Well for some cheap ladies, it works.

Men have been programmed to think that if he went up to a woman and complimented her on her looks, she’d go mental.

But we love being complimented. In fact most women are extremely flattered to be approached in this manner.

I do actually like it. Lol. But most men worry if she’s got a boyfriend or if the guy actually came with her? Rejection?

If she has a boyfriend, she’ll let you know. That’s if you meet the sincere ones that just hang out with their friends to have fun not the ones hoping to catch a fish. So yes, it’s that simple.

In my little experience, it’s very rare that a woman would get upset over being approached in such a manner.

From many hundreds of such approaches, I don’t think I’ve actually met a woman that was even mildly irritated.

As far as rejection goes: So what? Who cares? Does it really matter what some woman you don’t even know thinks? Think of all the terrible tragedies going on in the world today.

Think about all the stuff that’s happened to you over your life. Can you really tell me that the opinion of a stranger you just met matters to you so much?

We spend ages getting ourselves ready to go out. Do you really think we don’t want you guys to notice we look good?

Let me let you in on a major secret: The vast majority of women are tired of their romantic prospects beating around the bush and trying to be their “friend.” They are even more tired of their male “friends” trying to get into their pants.

When you have the balls to actually approach a woman and make your intentions clear it really gets their attention. It is bold, ballsy, and honest. Even when they have a boyfriend.

So guys, next time you see a gorgeous woman, what should you do? Tell her exactly what you’re thinking and what you want.

It’s not about using pickup lines, it’s about making your intent clear to her. “Excuse me, you look absolutely amazing. I’d love to take you out for a drink some time. When are you available?”

Not all the girls you approach will be interested in you, and you won’t be interested in some of them either, but at least you tried and came from a place of strength.

You’ve made your intentions clear and the conversation is leading somewhere: a date between you and her. It’s not going to be a 45-minute conversation that goes nowhere and at the end she reveals she’s engaged.

As you get more comfortable with interacting with women in this way, more and more of them will be immediately turned on by you being confident enough to approach them in this manner.

By showing that you’re man enough to express your true desires and intentions, not only will she have more respect for you, but she will also appreciate your honesty.

She will either tell you she’s not interested, agree to the date, or engage you in a conversation for a bit so she can determine if she’s interested.

Being up front with women isn’t an exercise, it’s a way of life!

No matter how each individual interaction goes, you manned up, told the truth, and laid it all out on the line like a man and that’s a great place to start! Trust me.

Behaving in this type of authentic manner will massively increase your confidence in all other areas of life as well.

Connecting with women is only the beginning!

To our happiness. Cheers.

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