RE-‘ I Thought She Was My Best Friend’
MY advice is this. Making someone else other than your spouse your confidant is a very wrong thing to do. That is why it is best to marry your best friend. In other words, marry someone you can relate with as a friend.
Communicating well with your spouse gets you closer and intimate and it gives little room for external body to intrude in your home. That also makes it hard for your spouse to cheat because you will easily know when he or she does.
Trusting people is not always too important once you can trust God and leave people open with equal chance to prove their worthiness. The person you should try to build trust with is your spouse and God although issues may arise learn to forgive.
As for your friend, you may not find it easy to relate with her like before but find it in your heart to forgive her because that is what the word of the Lord said we should do.
You don’t have much choice on that, you just have to forgive her to also get forgiveness from God Almighty. The lesson here is don’t share all your secrets with any other person but your hubby and learn to make him or her your best friend Falola Abiodun I honestly don’t know why I elected to reply to your post but I perceived a deep tinge of naivety and a feasible ignorance of how things really work.
At least around Nigeria. There could be a few exceptions though. If I may ask, are you re-married now and did you have any kids with your ex? I am a man and from the way you write, it suggests that you will always be attracted to “fly men” and you might have an unusually high propensity to attract women.
Bottom line, and always remember this: look for ways to resolve your differences in a relationship and there will always be another after the seemingly last bad one and again and again.
Tolerance, humility, loves and unbridled forgiveness immersed in generosity is the key. Now about your friend and friends, that’s a bit tricky and I know you are already very mad at this writer. But you are also obliged to forgive your friend much to free yourself.
Here, I must admit that your friend was not loyal enough but I think very little of her boyfriend that called you to break the news and you might also not agree that your friend might feel worse than you at her betrayal of your trust so give her a chance to relieve.
Again, the act is done and you shouldn’t lose all of it. At least you can gain the experience. Call her up and tell her that you’ve put all of the past behind you and will like to share a drink and say it from the bottom of your heart and in time she will share the details with you and you will learn form your mistakes and be a better person if ever you were in that circumstance again.
As for your friends, start calling all of them and apologize for your irrational action. Daz Hugo Sent from Desmond’s iPhone Hello, how are you doing today? Read your mail and it was a sad story. You don’t have to use what happened against your entire friends, you just have to take things slow. Roy Armani
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