For The Love Of Man (V)
… husbands, dwell … according to knowledge, giving honour unto the wife, …
(1 Peter 3:7 KJV)
I WANT to emphasis again the role of the husband in the home to be that of intelligent leadership. Man loses his manhood if he is not at the helm. Likewise woman loses her womanhood if she is not following. No pun intended here – the horse has to lead with his head – it goes everywhere head first and will not go unless the head leads.
Although a man and his wife are joint heirs, one person has to lead, one has to be responsible. And God has put man at the helm. A man – or anyone at all, cannot lead without knowledge. He cannot lead as he should. Certainly, he cannot lead if he has no understanding of the roles in marriage and of course, the nature and the worth of his wife.
Many wives have been accused of being busy bodies. I have to admit, I didn’t quite understand why this was or what was until I got married myself! And then…I discovered in me, the God given interest to know about everything that was going on. You see…God created woman to be a helper, just like our Father sent the Holy Spirit to be a helper to every son.
What good is He if we do not share all things with Him? How can a woman accomplish her assignment as helper and joint heir if her husband doesn’t give her the necessary information she needs to help?
Having said that, even though woman have been wired to help which explains their honest, loving and active interest in the going about of marriage and the home, she must not fall into the same trap that Eve did – relying on her own fleshly/sensual understanding.
She must seek God for wisdom so that she can assist and speak with knowledge, wisdom, kindness and humble authority. She can only do this effectively with godliness if she herself is subject to God first and then to her husband.
Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the saviour of the body. Therefore as the church is subject unto Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in every thing. Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave himself for it;
(Ephesians 5:22-25 KJV)
Some people shudder at the very command that women should submit wilfully to their own husband.
It is true that it is easier to do when your husband is a good and kind man (I am utterly grateful for mine!). a woman is most appreciative of the truth and the grace in that command (and blossoms in true womanhood) when she finds a man who understands it.
According to this scripture, man is responsible for the …romance at home – for the emotional security of the woman. God created and wills that a woman should feel secure and protected in her husband’s affection. When a husband criticizes his wife, beats, scorns and scolds her, or gives to another the affection due only to his wife, he threatens her emotional security and abuses her at her core.
This leads to a disintegration of the marriage relationship. (Now you can understand why many women are so adverse and combative with men in general – they have been emotionally abused). It also hinders the divine flow of grace and favour from God for it is God that he ultimately scorns. God takes this seriously. 1 Peter 3:7 says that a man should honour his wife “… that your prayers be not hindered” You are to love and honour your wife as Christ loves the church – not because she is always lovable but He honours her with love still.
The bride that God gives His son is the church. The bride that cost the death of the Son is the church. Is it a wonder that marriage is likened to the relationship that Christ has with the church? That’s how importantly God views marriage.