Make Your Man Your Stylist

THE other day, I was quite excited reeling off to my friend what I was going to add to my New Year wardrobe. Instead of agreeing with me or at least adding to my list of spigot straps, tight-bodies, off shoulders and low-cut waists, my friend was silent, too silent. She has always been a sound dresser and our fashion adviser. And that was the reason I had come to her after deciding that ‘this New year o, I am going to give them finish. Although I had made my decision to transform from a frumpy mouse to a svelte and coiffured damsel, I honestly was not sure if my style of clothes would suit me. That was why I had come to her pretending to be on the same fashion scale as she is, and wise in the sense of style. Deep down, I knew I was not and still remember some fashion blunders I had made while trying to leave my rather dull and regular way of dressing.

Done with my list, I turned to her for approval or some criticism. Instead, she told me quietly to “leave that to your husband to decide.” Stung and dumb, I stared at her. What is she talking about? If I did not know Linda, I would have said that she was jealous of the possibility that my wardrobe allowance has become so fat and bursting at the seams. But all of us acknowledge her fashion sense. And as one we see as a trend setter, she could never be short of funds.

Disappointed therefore, I asked her if she always asked for Sonny’s (her husband) seal before she wore a thing.

“I do”, she said with a sweet smile. Even the mini-skirt? “Yeah,, I know when and where to wear them to.”

This was my friend whose trousers barely covered the top of her legs. How was that possible? I thought of all the disagreements a piece of clothing could cause between me and my guy when I had thought I had impressed and looked at my friend with envy and annoyance and left.

But in my disappointment, I could see that her suggestion made sense. As girls and simple women, we are used to dressing to please ourselves and nobody else. But once in a relationship, it is good to make your guy a partner in your style of dressing. We make the mistake of thinking that men do not really notice what we wear, but they do. The difference is that while a man may find it difficult to understand fashion and why women strive so hard to be in vogue, they know what is good for a woman. They also know what is not good for a woman. They also know what is not good on you. If in doubt, look at the way his eyes light up when you dress in a particular manner or the way he looks confused when you think you have done your best, style sense. This is not saying that we should dress to please a man, but why make all the effort if the aim is not please on the long run?

If you follow fashion blindly, you are only trying to impress your girlfriends who you want to notice you as someone who is always up to date in fashion. And truly, all they see is fashion but not really a good taste or judgement. But asking your guy’s opinion makes you a confident dresser.

A lady made a complete overhaul of her wardrobe when her 12-year-old nephews condemned her entire style as ‘too revealing! They advised her to borrow some ‘normal’ styles to pack her travelling bag.

It may be because the men look at the woman’s style from the other side, but they tend to notice what women would not see so easily.

Some people think too that showing a near naked butlocks or baring ample bossom scores them a hit with the menfolk. But just as much as complete cover-up can make a man panic, so also is baring private areas in the name of fashion could scare them.

A middle-aged woman and a much younger one exchanged hot words recently because of low waist trousers. A man who had a full view of the girl’s bare butts had quietly told her to cover up. But the girl told him that she was “taking breeze”. The answer offended the woman who told her that she should listen to a man if nobody else.

Your girlfriends may not point out your fashion faux pas because they would think that you would not believe them. There might be some competition as well and they really want you to go out there and disgrace yourself. True.

I was at a party some weeks ago and saw a cute girl in a micro cat-suit. She wore fish net tights underneath. She looked a number and showed off quite some. But when she shifted a leg, I noticed that her suit was torn right between her legs, revealing lacy white briefs. She disappeared briefly and emerged in a stunning one-shoulder dress.

But then, I heard one woman sitting next to me remark the other ‘somebody has told her’ which meant that they saw the tear all along. Your man’s opinion would make sure that you are decently covered and not wasting time looking for flaws in your style.

I know a lady whose husband buys her entire clothes including her underwear. I trust his choice was her candid reply.

If you have a reliable opinion, you are not likely to buy what you could regret later.

You do not have to let him buy for you if you do not think that he won’t buy what you like. Just take him to the shop when you buy or invite him to the tailor’s place. He will know exactly how much off the shoulder your blouse should fall to look good.

We are still trying to figure out how wearing brassiere straps came to be accepted as fashion. More so, stained, snagged and weak ones that are displayed so prominently as an outer wear these days.

There is no doubt that you wash your own and it smells fresh with cleanliness and perfume. But do ask him if he wants you to sport bra straps in place of waistcoat. If he does not like it, it means that it could not be so popular a fad at all.