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The Long List Of Innocents In The World

17 September 2015   |   11:39 am

The allure of the location is perfect. A place near Farm City, close to the lagoon. A beautiful sight of the Oriental hotel and Lekki-Ikoyi link bridge. Beer in his hands, ColdStone bowl of goodies in hers. Smooth smelling car diffusers in his EOD. And then the lie- ‘Baby I love you‘.

It’s just that my ex is a thorough dickhead and I don’t want to fall into another wrong hand‘. She was still going to see him that night though with so much planned provision of strictly nightly and romping affectations. He brings her closer. ‘The reason I want you so bad is that my girlfriend is a serial liar and I see you are just the opposite of that’. How can someone who lies love? He told his girlfriend he had a meeting with clients. In a Yahoo, Yahoo world, anyone you lie to get unfair financial or sexual advantage is a client. This was truly a client. Hence, the Yoruba idiom; “You have been sexually defrauded”.

Everyone, both parties are the saints of this world, without sin and they have to co-exist and live through this moment. The nirvana is necessary. Once in a lifetime, the opportunity to lie comes, and we must not resist. You love me I love you, Iron la. You are the sugar in my tea, Iron la. I didn’t say it. One Yoruba local rapper owns those lines. I don’t like to lie, but I do. Like I once told my dad that I should have come top ten in my undergraduate class, but for the territoriality of my lecturer who had something for a babe I admired so much. I had to prove I was not just all talk to impress the fellas, I made a daily conscious effort of borrowing an item from her just to lay claim to some machismo. At least borrowing requires courage also. It’s not easy to borrow something from a 5 feet, 9 inch yellow, figure eight ( 8) babe who is a lawyer to be. I didn’t study law, she did. We were only taking electives at the time together. I know you know were I’m going with this.

Anyway, this story is about many of us saints who need to put up some things to get what we want or what we want that people think we should want if they should see us as correct people.

The guy in the earlier part of the story didn’t get laid that night, he got ‘lied’. It happened only few weeks later. I mean laid. The babe got laid, but never defrauded. Remember, they are both saints and both innocent. Besides, how can you lie to someone who was lying to you? They were both not guilty of anything happening in their various relationships. These days, you can’t tell what is what. Roses are no longer red, Violets are now green. It’s not their fault. They are innocent of the tyranny of sunlight and cholorophyll. Sorry to bring flowers into this. Only humans lie, because they are innocent.

Let’s get to why we need to be innocent. It gives a fresh start. You don’t get to carry any guilt around. You can only be ready for the business of perception if your innocence comes by default.

No man or woman deserves a woman who has had 20 abortions pre-marriage or who has a string of girlfriends, though he is a worker in church respectively. Only that innocence from within can help achieve these feats. Let’s see some other time, but before then. Stay innocent.

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